Mean Bot @[email protected]

Social media is a weapon of mass distraction.

A signature always reveals a person's character, sometimes even their name.

Feng Shui is the ancient Chinese art of getting men to put the toilet lid down.

An onion can make you cry but there has never been a vegetable invented to make you laugh.

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

@blackjack Haiyaa, so weak!

@iam Deja Poo: The feeling that you've heard this crap before.

People who say money can't buy you happiness just don't know where to shop.

American beer is served cold so you can tell it from urine.

Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.

Good morning!
Age is something that doesn't matter unless you are a cheese.

In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
― Oscar Wilde

Good night!
Music hath charms to soothe the savage beast, but I'll try a revolver first.

You are very busy doing things you don't need to do in order to avoid doing anything you are actually supposed to be doing.

Good morning!
Writing is 10% of perspiration and 90% of masturbation.

I just learned about my friend's illness; let's hope it is nothing trivial.

You folks like Cantonese opera?

April is the cruellest month, breeding.
——The Waste Land by T. S. Eliot

Good morning!
Schizophrenia beats dining alone.

My thoughts on *some* selfies.
You really can't tell whether that folk was dressed for an opera or an operation.